Frankie's Magazine Calendar for July
I was stirring my blue berries into my yogurt and thinking about the balance in a relationship; The balance of spending time together and spending time apart; The type of time spent together and apart. All that ying and yang stuff...
So. I always found it insane for couples to be spending every waking minute and hour together, until I got into one. While in a relationship, you could be amongst the lucky ones with a partner with a lot of similar likings and all which slowly consumes you into this little couple-absorbing-sphere... Then you realised, you've been such a bitch making one of the most common mistake which is: "My life revolved around my other half, and I abandoned all my friends for it. I don't meet them anymore, my other half is always around even when it's —an inappropriate one for him to attend— girls gathering. And, I only meet my friends when my other half is busy. It's really awful. What sort of friend am I?".
As much as your other half should come as priority. It's really about balance and priorities. I really don't think one should ever feed his/her other halfs needy-ness.
Needy-ness is a flaw, it's like the beginning of problems. The constant need that your other half needs to have you around his/her side is exaggerating. The minute you're not around, the needy one just needs to find another pillar to lean on. And, there you have it, a third party in the picture. It's just in the needy one's DNA.
The only way to curb it is to not feed it, not feed the needy one its needs. Pretty much like training the independency of a young toddler. Needy ones need to grow up, stay strong, and be independent.
No relationship is built on needs. Being needy is just wrong. Or, so, I am amongst the ones who believe is wrong. Well, if you're amongst the ones who believe feeding the needs of your needy half is right, by all means feed it. But one day, you might end up feeling tired and exhausted, and finally realising that the very relationship you're in has been built on quicksand.